My favourite app is the off switch.

Husband bought an iPhone 4. It's my fault really, I left him unattended in the mall while I picked up movie tickets. I was barely gone 15 minutes and in that time Husband went from 'just looking' to 'where do I sign?'  


I'm sure the little sales goblin heard me coming back and sped up his pitch, too.  I saw him nearly slice his own arm off trying to speed swipe Husband's Visa just as I turned the corner.

Now Husband owns a phone which cost us more than my first car.  A phone designed to be more sleek and powerful and invisibly slender than all other wafer thin phones before it.  A phone with literally more bells, bings and strange vibrations than any device Husband has ever owned and this is a man who owns an airplane.  For the record, Husband is a bit of a gadget junkie but he also has the rage of a gamma-rayed lowland gorilla when it comes to things that beep, flicker, disconnect, or fail to send up a flare when he loses them.


Yup.  This tiny, 5 ounce 2.5" X 4.5" phone is just the best idea ever.

And just to add unicorn sprinkles to the salesman's day, Husband mentioned that  he was afraid to drop it on the way out of the store.  This prompted the grinning demon spawn behind the counter to offer us a selection of highly durable 'sleeves' with which the wretched thing patently does not come.  These are all designed to protect it from 'mild shock or jarring' and, to his credit, the salesman was able to say this with a completely straight face.  Husband bought a black one based solely on the fact that it was actually marketed as a 'flippy sleeve.'  I love him.

Husband is very excited by all of the many features the phone has and by the apps that (ha ha) one can buy for it.  


"It's not just a phone, Sweetie," he geeked at me on the way home.  "It's a personal lifeline. It GPS's; it searches; it emails. It informs, educates and shrinks to world to the palm of the hand."  He is a lot of fun when he is in this heightened, nerd-like state and I enjoy showing him off at parties for the entertainment value.

These apps, the ones that will expand his mind so far he'll be able to knot it under his chin, are many and varied.  They will indeed shrink the globe and expand his horizons.  With the power of the Internet in his pocket, Husband will be a Swiss Army Spouse, knowledgeable and ready to react.

As soon as he beats level 12 on 'Angry Birds'.