Blending in with Albertans

Going to 'The City'

I don't know where you live but I can only assume that you live in or within a day's drive of a major city somewhere in Canada or, if the stats on Blogger are to be believed, Eurasia. That is just dew on puppies dandy but if you don't live near The City then you are lost in a barren wasteland bereft of the cultural richness that is Edmonton Alberta and it's many glorious meats on sticks.

The pride an Albertan takes in claiming The City as their own is inversely proportional to how far from it they live. Someone living in Old Strathcona might think they feel a certain civic pride as they hop from bus to slushy sidewalk but that's nothing compared to the guy from Fort Mac on a weekend off. You can tell a true Albertan by how fiercely proud they are of the trouble it takes to get to The City and how fast they can make the drive on a Friday night.

Going to The City is a major pastime here. Talking about going consumes the 50% of the day not spent commenting about how arid is the snowfall. Planning the next trip, complaining about the length of time between trips, bragging about the trip just made or pretending to be interested in someone else's trip even though they clearly have no idea what they are talking about because everybody knows the best shopping is on White Ave.; it all blends together into a passionate yammer that you would do well to join or risk being branded a Torontonian (read "forner").

One final tip: Albertans only refer to one city as The City and I warn you now if you have to ask an Albertan which city that is I suggest you do so only after putting on The Kevlar. Those who live in Calgary or even Red Deer (hits spittoon dead on) are, for the most part, proud of their little metropolises and their cute little sports teams and adorable towers. So precious. But only the capital gets the capitals and that's that.

I am excited because I am, this very weekend, going to The City. It's my first time making the nearly four hour drive on my own but the payoff will be a visit with a fantastic friend. The shoe shopping will make up for the October arrival of winter and the sweet taste of freshly prepared sushi will go some distance towards making up for all the rest.

All the rest naturally refers in this instance to Alberta.