So Fired

Things Said to Me By Actual Canadians, My Reactions to Which

 Are Eventually Going To Get Me Fired 

1. Where's my package?
2. Do you know where my package is?
3. I'm really worried about my package.
4. I've been watching my package move but it seems to have stopped.
5. I'm concerned about how my package was handled.
6. Am I the only one who cares about my package?
7. Who do I speak to about getting my hands on my brother's package?
8. Thank you for handling my package.
9. My package is leaking fluids.
10. If I send you a picture of my package, can you tell me if you think it looks normal?

This has been an episode of Package Handler

 and Professional Platitude Provider:

Apologize, validate, apologize authentically again, thank with apology, offer a fourth,

 even more genuine apology and close with a final thanks and one last apology

 which supersedes all previous apologies in it's sincerity.