A Prayer

O Closet, which art in my room, hallowed be thy contents. 
I have honoured you with fresh offerings from Karan and Klein in the hopes that you have not shrunk any of my clothes like you did last month.
Give me this day a fabulous look which will turn heads,
And forgive me for the corduroy, I knew not what I was doing.
Lead me not into polyester,
But deliver me from shoulder pads,
For Thine is the wisdom of hemlines and colour pairing.
Let my party dresses fit me,
Amen.