The Christmas List

The following is a list of things which Husband has thrown forcibly off the back deck after declaring (and I'm paraphrasing here) that the airborne item in question was useless.

1. A sewing machine
2. The toaster (on fire)
3. The cooling fan from the fridge-freezer
4. Dog beds
5. A sledge hammer
6. The microwave (also on fire)
7. A canoe
8. Kawasaki KLX-250 motorcycle carburetor
9. A mitre saw
10. Monopoly
11. A pool pump
12.  Our Kirby Upright vacuum (not on fire but close)
13. The cordless phone ('It was beeping')
14. Cell phone ('I can't get it to beep')
15. A Christmas tree
16. His iPhone