How to Obtain and Use a Cold Lake Community Card or 'Rec Pass'

In 12 Easy Steps 

Step 1 

Go to the gym and ask the PSP front counter staff on duty for a Community Card registration form, as directed by the helpful MFRC Welcome Coordinator. Expect that this will be the only step.

Step 2

Get told that the registration needs the military member's name, rank, serial number, date of birth, shoe size, ice cream flavour preference and digital difference of left hand. Be assured that this is the only step.

Step 3

Chase down Husband who is on one of forty 'away' missions that are 100% necessary a mere 3 weeks into the posting.  Get required information. Share bemused looks via Facetime.

Step 4

Return with the required information filled out on the form. Get told that the member's Confusing and Useless Acronym Card must also be presented, although the member himself is not required. Be informed that this, certainly, will be the only step.

Step 5

Wait for Husband to get home.

Step 6

Wait some more.

Step 7

Request Confusing and Useless Acronym Card from returned Husband, who insists I perform a blood oath not to lose it. Like, ever. Seriously. 

Step 8

Guard Confusing and Useless Acronym Card with life from bears and terrorists and such. 

Step 9

Return with required information filled out on form and the Confusing and Useless Acronym Card. Present both to the PSP front counter staff. Get told the member himself must be present in order for the information to be validated. Receive assurance that this, finally, is the only step.

Step 10

Sweetly point out that at each step the helpful PSP front counter staff, various, had assured me that there was only one step. Focus discussion on the cheerful nature of the staff in question, on the busyness of the their days, on the understanding of the pressures of a front desk job.  Appeal to the PSP front counter staff's alleged humanity.  Point out that the member is not really required because, look, I have all the 'just one step' steps ticked off, right here. Finish with an encouraging smile.

Step 11

Receive Community Card.  Make dinner plans. Part as friends.

Step 12

Attend gym the next day.  Walk right in, do not get asked to present card. Wander the building a bit, use a treadmill, check out the staff lounge, rearrange office furniture in lobby, admire the pool and leave without being questioned at all, by anyone, in any way.