Thursday, January 24, 2019

A Bit Flushed

I am late to hop on the resolution bus this year but I've finally narrowed all of my problems down and set myself one simple goal. Hydrate.

I am going to drink 4 litres of water each day, for the next 30 days. 

It turns out I don't really drink as much water as I thought. I always have a water bottle at my desk and it always seems to be about half full (of water) so someone must be filling it and taking the first few optimistic swigs. But I also have a three cup a day coffee habit, an afternoon and an evening tea, sometimes a soda as a treat when I am out and occasionally a tall decaf flat white with almond milk, extra wet, on Tuesdays to keep me from waltzing right out over the edge.  

I've worked it out and in terms of just plain water, I drink less than 500 ml daily. The rest of my fluids come with added dairy, sugar or in extreme cases, pudding.

I am also curled in a tiny hobbled ball every morning, my spine and feet about a century older than the rest of me. Tired and achy all day, it takes me ages to recover from a Zumba class or folding laundry. I was sick a few days ago and I am not sure which was a greater shock to  my system, the gastro virus or the half litre of Pedialite I managed to keep down in an effort to stave off dehydration. 

If I can make it through the next 30 days and 120 L of pure H2O, I am promised, among other benefits, glowing skin and hair, more energy, improved flexibility and recovery, and kidneys rinsed so clean you could eat off them.

Day 1: I have peed 8 times already and it is not even noon.



Wednesday, January 23, 2019

Meeker's Song

This tree is my tree, it isn't your tree
I peed on this tree, that makes is my tree.
It's in your front yard, but it is mine now.
This tree and all the other trees.